Mecum Monterey 2010

[LongRanger]

. . . 'cause littler's just gotta be cheaper, right?

I wonder who buys these things, any way? I mean, aside from all the usual stupid boat expenses, there's the not-so-minor matter of, well --- dealing with all that wood. Jeez. Even a little one has gotta be a chore to live with. Dry storage. Re-varnishing. NOT dinging anything, ever. (I mean, can you imagine docking this thing? Bumping up against all those re-treads, hanging off the dock? 'Just what kind of tires are those, anyway? And who ELSE has been rubbing up against them, huh?')

And can you imagine running this thing up on a sand bar? Or pulling a cleat?

'Mommy --- does Daddy have something stuck in his throat? 'Cause he kinda looks like Morris --- you know, when he coughs up a hair-ball."

'No Dear -- that's just Daddy' infarcting. He'll be fine in a few thousand dollars. More lotion?'

[LongRanger]

What happened to 'I'?

Anyway, 'Alcazar' is a Spanish word for a kind of castle --- comes from the Arabic term 'al qasr,' which means palace or fortress. Do you think that the Guy who named the boat had any idea of what the name meant? . . .

[LongRanger]

. . . if it were me? --- one look at that engine room, and I'd call this . . .

Monstruo del Lago.

Or ---- Ala Kazaaaam!

Or, how 'bout . . .

El Kabong.

[LongRanger]

. . . a 'Jetson' boat!

A special Chris-Craft Dealer promo, built to generate show-room traffic only . . . never intended for public sale.

[LongRanger]

. . . but probably where I got my 'thing' for purple, as a kid.

With all that torque in a convertible (as in roof-less) body . . . its a wonder the doors even close.

[LongRanger]

. . . or Kobra?

'Glass or alu?

To-may-toe or to-mah-toe?

I can't tell, anymore. Replicants are almost better than the real thing. Even Shelby hisself fakes 'em, now. Surprised not to see his signature --- some where!

Least they didn't chrome the side-pipes. (Just the roll bar. And the bumper. And the handbrake. And . . . . )

[LongRanger]

Just stainless, Baby --- all steel.

[LongRanger]

. . . and I don't mean the TV.

I don't know -- this interior is weirdly naughty, you know? The anatomically ambiguous (and strangely suggestive) seat, the sucker-like head-rest, all that fur . . .

As for the rest . . . it sorta looks like Salvador Dali and George Barris watched 'War of the Worlds' together, hit the crack-pipe . . . . then had a fight over 'creative differences' in the fiberglass shop --- without proper ventilation.

[LongRanger]

That's more like it!

But real? . . .or replika?

Dunno . . .

[LongRanger]

My camera was running low on charge by this point --- I'd been taking pictures since the Concorso --- so I just snapped what I could, while I could . . .

Hemi. Black crackle finishes should be on every car designer's engine compartment repertoire . . .

Big-block Camaro, with those super-cool RS head-light doors . . . no stupid vinyl roof!